The DCS story...(long)( skip and Just read member comments)
One day I stumbled into a site competition and met Luminesque. She was the leader of the group I joined and she was the nicest person I had met online in a long time. It was July 2000 when I joined. I was going to be 25 years old and it was the loneliest time of my life. I had a husband, kids, friends, but something was mising from my life, and that's when I turned to the Internet.
I started making websites the year before and I planned to enter my newly *fixed* one into a competition with my friend, and boy was I glad I stumbled into this one. Luminesque, with her funny letters and her *wild hair ideas* always managed to sneak into my mailbox and make me smile.... I looked forward to hearing from her every week.
I then met Chimera.... aka Manda.
She was someone with an incredibly strong spirit (and attitude ;)...lol) whom I immediately connected with. We talked once in a while about different things, but she was more of the reserved kind.... like she didn't really *trust* internet friendships.. my problem.. I used to trust too easily...
Something happened a few months after I joined and Luminesque resigned. It was nasty. I was heartbroken for her, for the beautiful place she had created for everyone. Someone else took over and I watched Chimera shine. She came into the spot light offering all her ideas and everything was good...everything was awesome!
I had been asked to reconstruct halloween... and some other sites as well... they took down everything Luminesque had built as if to wipe her off that place.... but they could never wipe her out of my heart. I *secretly* adopted Luminesque as my big sister, and promised myself I would somehow make everything right again... I needed to bring back what I felt when she was there... that sense of belonging somewhere... of being able to type *GRRRRRRRR!!!!!* on the email and know she would quickly answer with something to make me feel better.
I was asked to take over what was once Luminesque's position in October 2000. Everyone was relieved I guess I was doing it, since they knew me already and what I was capable of doing. I adopted everyone of the girls who worked there with me. I made them my friends, my sisters, and even adopted one as my *daughter...
I met Rosebloom, Fantasia and Shoulshine, and Shadow during this time....Chimera resigned. I was so sad to see her go... I was so looking forward to working with her, but she was pregnant and she didn't approve of the way things were being run by the webmistress (too much backstabbing she said) and she didn't need the added stress... "I hope it's different with you" she said.
November passed.... december.... and we went from 13 to 56...some even working 2-3 teams. When January arrived I was tired. I had this idea floating in my head and I began to stop sleeping at night to get it down on a site. The idea of DCS was born. I would create something for for the girls (and *1* guy..) that were there, to let them have more fun...that was the whole point anyway right? To have fun? After all no one was paying them!
I just knew they would love the idea of *trading* and *collecting* the cartoon dolls I had been making for them since october....
The webmistress and I had developed some kind of friendship that was emotionally draining to me. I guess because she is the type who needs people to tell her she is wonderful... and in her words... I was one of the few honest people she knew.. so if I told her it was good.. then she knew it was.
She would call everyday to show me things she had just done..ask me for opinions on just about everything. I found myself struggling for more time to *tend* to her needs as well as everyone else. I asked for help many times, they all replied they knew I would do something great. I hung in until April 2001.
I told the webmistress I needed to resign. I was tired ..burned out.. had too many problems with my husband.. I asked my assistant if she wanted to take over...she said no. I was looking for someone to replace me, but they didn't want me to go...we were 64 in May when I finally resigned. I hung in until I could.
I hung in until then for the friendships. The day I realized the way everyone was being used... how nothing was more important that to have her precious site competition be #1 (which to this day is *not*) to have all the teams updated... I knew it was over for me. I didn't want to keep giving so much of myself, my creativity, my time, my love ...specially when someone who didn't care about anyone but herself was running the show.
I never asked for anything.
I just wanted time to do my own things, tend to my family and finish my idea of DCS. ...which of course I decided to keep to myself... if I had given her this idea... I would have had to give it up when I resigned and I didn't want to work with her anymore. She didnt' care about anyone ...as I am sure she didn't care about me....so after she *acted* like she didn't know why I gave someone the answer I did, and tried to make me look bad... when it had been her idea all along.. I resigned.
I gave them a week, but that night they changed all passwords...tried to make it look like I just left, but they never counted on the friendships I had built.... those same friendships where the reason I hung in for so long... I never expected what happened after wards. I never expected all the tears... and the kind words, all the beautiful things I received from almost everyone I had been in contact with.
Although DCS was ready to go June 1st 2001, I invited my *friends* to come and look and see if they wanted to join. Told them what it was about and what I hoped it would become. I told them I wouldn't make them do anything (my nifty little way of getting the so say yes! lol so I wouldn't be the only one!!) We worked on ideas through emails...chats and tried to figure out what it was we were doing... and got ready to open on June 18, 2001.
The applications started flying in.. we were getting 20-30 a week but no one really knew what they were supposed to do and we were swamped with questions and trying to screen out the sites that were ready ..and the ones who just had nothing better to do.
We were determined that this would not be just another webring ...and that we would make something good for everyone. We would build some kind of group and link everyone together with the dolls.. why not? If they didn't want to join because they didn't know how to make them..we would teach them!
Luminesque suggested we closed for the rest of the summer until September, so we could reorganize as well as work with the members we had. We closed at the end of July 2001. We just needed to know what it was we were doing! We spent the month of August rebuilding, reshaping and getting to know those who had joined....so when we reopened we could tell others what it was we were about.
Today (11.08.2001) I was asked just what is DCS about? Is it just to trade dolls? is it just links? Is it a group for doll makers only? I didn't know what to answer. DCS does have trading... but that's just an excuse to get to know each other (I mean who really has everyone's dolls?..I think I stopped after I got barbiis doll in June!!) So I decided to make this page (thanks for reading all the way down here!!) I began thinking about DCS when it started and what it had become.
And I had this nice little speech written, which I had planned to write here and just let you read.... but I decided to ask those members who wanted to... to tell me what they thought about DCS ...what it meant to them...if anything..and I will tell you one thing before I let you read everyone's thoughts..... DCS is more than just dolls. I dont' have the words to describe it today (maybe I will next year) but I think that you will find the difference in DCS is honesty and compassion.
I am not this wonderful person. I have been told I have an attitude problem, and I think those who know me know of my temper.. and of the kind of mouth I can have if I choose to... so I will tell you right now Mystic is NOT DCS. I created DCS, but it has turned into something good because of everyone who is here... everyone who takes the time to say hello...to sneak into our chats..even if it's just for a few minutes... everyone who when we ask ...they say *I'm there*.
I have always had the misfortune of thinking everyone is *good* or has some good in them. The internet changed that for me. Earlier this year I had turned into a lonely and bitter person. I was tired of everything.. I felt *sure they like me...but that's just cause I get things done* ....that started to flow into my everyday life...with my husband my family..my children.
It affected even the way I talked to (:::or better yet.. yelled at:::) the people at the drive through in mcdonalds.... so I guess you could say I was being selfish when I started DCS..... this was my therapy. I needed to find my way back into believing that you CAN give to people and help and teach and make them feel better... and they in turn will turn around and maybe be more patient with the check out girl at the supermarket who maybe isn't having such a great day.
Thank you DCS.
In an internet filled with hypocrytes, liars, mean and jealous people.... you have all managed to find your way into my life and into this site. Who knew three letters could one day mean so much to me.... but they do.... it's not the site... it's not the number of visits... it not the popularity... its not the amount of members (I am actually thinking about limiting it to 100 for a while...so we can build those friendships and then help more people in)... It's nothing that a regular group would care about. I dont even know what it is *yet* but I hope to figure it out one day!!
I could delete this site right now, just disappear from the internet (dont worry I won't lol) and know if I went with my family to North Carolina, or to Canada, or Ohio, or Alabama or (beth i dont remember right now what state but that's just cause the kids are fighting in here) Connecticut or NY, or wherever... all I had to do was send an email out and say "Hey I'm going to be going up.. wanna meet?" and I KNOW there wouldn't be enough hours in the day or enough days in the weeks to spend together talking.... laughing...
So what is DCS?
Maybe we are like those dating services... but a instead of finding dates we find friends...... Is that possible? Does anyone out there just sometimes feel like screaming *I NEED A FRIEND?!!* Do people surf through sites looking for someone they could have something in common with? Someone they could identify with? Is that why we have webrings? guestbooks? Hoping someone would say something nice that would make us go into their site and maybe start a new friendship?
I don't know about you.....I know I do, and I am lucky, I have my DCS friends.